1/6/14

 

Today marks the first 'real' day back to a routine since the loss of my hubby. Although my son and I have been back to work, my daughter hasn't resumed back to her schedule until now. She has tried a few days, but I think today will be the day. She was nervous all night, and didn't sleep too much. This morning she got right up, didn't complain of any bellyaches, or fears. I hope she was excited to go be with her friends. Her school (the staff, parents, and kids) has been super supportive. More than I would have even imagined. I am very grateful for them, and have been since her transfer in third grade. I will be sad when she has to leave, as we just found out that they won't be having a 7th and 8th grade. :(  This week she will also go back to piano... I think she could have gone back to that awhile ago, but I haven't had the desire to drive her. Reality hits hard this week, with routine, homework, and the 'must get it done' things. I hope it is a good thing, for us all.

  We begin some counseling this week, and some group sessions next week. It isn't easy going forward after someone so important to you leaves, and I am hoping to give us all some ways of dealing with it the very best we can.

  I have been feeling a little more anxious lately, with my social anxieties. I am not sure why, but I did initiate a friend lunch today. :) I am going to try my very best to 'get out' of my comfort zone, and push myself, but I am also 100% ok with my 'home body' lazy days. I look forward to them a little too much, so going out is great too!

  It hasn't even been an hour that she has been at school.... I miss her! She drives me bonkers sometimes, but she has been my sidekick over the last ten weeks and I will feel the change for sure. We spend almost every second together, she still sleeps with me, on daddy's side of the bed & she is my 'date' if we leave the house. Maybe I could go wake up my teen.... haha! That could get ugly, since it's not even noon yet! Keat has been a comfort most of the time, and makes me proud. He hasn't had a lot of motivation either, but he is getting better. He has been working a lot more, and he likes to keep busy with his friends. We get comfort by talking about his dad, but I know it is a 'bitter sweet'. Sometimes he just wants to sit down and talk with dad. We all do! They enjoy all the same sport teams, and the Seahawks are doing great right now. We hate that he isn't here to cheer them on, and talk 'hawk talk' with Keaton.

  Well, I am done blogging for today. I hope that on this first Monday of the New Year that you are all able to find your 'happy' or your 'blessings'. Today really is a gift. Like it or not, unwrap it carefully and be grateful for it, as someone else gave all they had to be able to have this day but it was taken from them. We can fight the funk together!!